I ended up in Cyprus a year after Rhodes and felt the same way. I sat on a bench overlooking Knossos bay. On my first night there we had a huge storm over the sea. I had never seen clouds like this and the lightning lit them up like a concert. I love storms and rain so for me this was amazing. But once again no one was around to see and share my enjoyment of it. Even sitting on the beach, watching families and couples, it can make you feel extremely small and lost. It is true what they say, being surrounded by people can be a very lonely place.
I believe I have a huge amount to give. Romance to me is an innate need to show someone they are your world, a need to protect them. There is no TRY with them, you just DO. They become an extension of you, without them you are incomplete and it hurts. This is the bit I dread the most. This bit scares me. The needing and wanting someone so much, that without them, you would be totally destroyed, totally useless.
“Nothing makes us more vulnerable than when we love somebody”
Chakotay to Neelix in Star trek Voyager.
A geeky reference but it’s stayed with me all these years.